May

2006

34: Visited By Zeus

Amber has been selected for a very special destiny – to disappoint this 19-year-old on his birthday and incubate the next Hercules. Mythology and pornography have never gone so well together.

a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Happy birthday! What do you want for your birthday?
j_dunlevy_69: u want to know the truth?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! The truth will set you free
j_dunlevy_69: i want u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You want to be my boyfriend?
j_dunlevy_69: yes is that bad?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No! That’s so good!
j_dunlevy_69: so do u want to go out with me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Of course!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I don’t get to go out of the house very much.
j_dunlevy_69: me neither
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: My dad is so crazy!
j_dunlevy_69: do u even mind that i am 19?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No way! But he might
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He will not allow me to have a boyfriend.
j_dunlevy_69: why?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He says my womb must be kept pure.
j_dunlevy_69: do u think that also?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I don’t know. He is very religious and stuff.
j_dunlevy_69: i’m asking u do u think that ur womb must be kept pure?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I don’t know!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He says that the new messiah will be born from me but only if I am good and pure.
j_dunlevy_69: what would we do if we did meet?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I would like to kiss you and do all the things women do with men!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But what if…
j_dunlevy_69: what if what?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What if he’s right?
j_dunlevy_69: what if he’s not
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I guess we will have to take that chance!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That’s why I want to have cyber sex first.
j_dunlevy_69: i guess we will
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Because that will not ruin my chances of having Zeus come down to earth and impregnate me with the next of a new generation.
j_dunlevy_69: have u ever played with urself before?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! I love to masturbate!
j_dunlevy_69: would u ever let a guy eat u out?
j_dunlevy_69: i’m talking about eating ur pussy out
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: My womb?
j_dunlevy_69: yes
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What if god came and decided to plant His holy seed in me while you were orally pleasuring my womb?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: It would blow your head clean off!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: My womb is a total spiritual danger zone.
j_dunlevy_69: he won’t
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: How can you be sure?
j_dunlevy_69: u are a virgin huh?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes.
j_dunlevy_69: can i be ur first?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But if you are my first my womb will not be pure for the new Messiah
j_dunlevy_69: u want to know what ur dad is doing?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Well, I do know, he is passed out in the garage.
j_dunlevy_69: he is trying to make u lose ur virginity at a very old age
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Why would he do that?
j_dunlevy_69: so u won’t have sex
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But what about Zeus? White swan, half-god child, new messiah, etc?
j_dunlevy_69: that is all fake
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No!
j_dunlevy_69: what?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: How can it be fake?
j_dunlevy_69: it just is god can’t make u the new messiah
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No, my child will be the messiah!
j_dunlevy_69: well if it is can i be the father babe?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No, Zeus must bless me with his seed!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: After I give birth to the messiah we can have as much fornication as we want.
j_dunlevy_69: answer me truthfully ok
j_dunlevy_69: do u want to have sex with me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! So much! It is your birthday, after all!
j_dunlevy_69: how are we going to do this babe?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: How about this:
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You go up to Mount Olympus and request an audience with the gods.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I will send you naked pictures of me to give to Zeus. You will have to collect his sperm manually.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Are you following me so far?
j_dunlevy_69: yes i am honey
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So you’ve got the sperm of Zeus, presumably in some sort of enchanted goblet, right?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You bring it down to earth and to my house.
j_dunlevy_69: ok
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You make love to me! I can’t wait to feel you!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But when you’re about to have an orgasm (my dad told me about all of this), you have to pull out and pour that goblet into my womb.
j_dunlevy_69: ok
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And then I get pregnant with the new god-child and we live happily ever after!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What do you think? It’s perfect!
j_dunlevy_69: yes but how can i get a meeting with the gods?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: There are several methods.
j_dunlevy_69: baby i want to make love to u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And you can! But I cannot have your baby!
j_dunlevy_69: i’ll pull out
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I need to have a baby who can lead our people to salvation!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: It doesn’t matter if you pull out, if even one drop of your fluid touches my womb I am sullied!
j_dunlevy_69: how about i pull out way before i cum
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: The instant your penis touches my womb there will be contamination.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You need to do this whole artificial insemination thing.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I’ll settle for Osiris if you can’t get Zeus.
j_dunlevy_69: what do u mean by artificial insemination?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You will need to put the divine sperm in me.
j_dunlevy_69: so what u are saying is before me and u make love i have to get a special sperm
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Right, from a top-level deity of any major pantheon – Odin, Zeus, Jehovah, Allah – you know.
j_dunlevy_69: so in other words i will never be able to make love to u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I really want you to be with me!
j_dunlevy_69: then why do i have to get a special sperm
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Because I am the vessel in which the savior of mankind will incubate!
j_dunlevy_69: what are u doing right now?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Sitting in my bra and panties, feeling so horny!
j_dunlevy_69: really
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Mmm-hmm
j_dunlevy_69: what do u want to talk about?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Us getting together.
j_dunlevy_69: like what?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Like how I said!
j_dunlevy_69: ok
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: With the goblet and you making love to me and all that.
j_dunlevy_69: u want to know what i want to do to u?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! Tell me!
j_dunlevy_69: i want to make out with u for at least an hour
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I am excited by your concepts!
j_dunlevy_69: really
j_dunlevy_69: are u getting horny?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So horny!
j_dunlevy_69: what are u doing right now?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Thinking about giving birth to the new messiah!
j_dunlevy_69: the thing that i am thinking about is making long passionate love to u
j_dunlevy_69: are u wet?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Wet with the spirit!
j_dunlevy_69: what is ur dad doing right now?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He is passed out in the garage.
j_dunlevy_69: why is he passed out in the garage?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He is drunk.
j_dunlevy_69: what are u wearing?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Bra and panties and the crossed-axe symbol of the roman empire.
j_dunlevy_69: really
j_dunlevy_69: do u want to touch urself?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Where?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Oh my god
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Oh holy Zeus
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: It’s happening!
j_dunlevy_69: what are u talking about?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He’s here!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: The light is so bright!
j_dunlevy_69: really what is he doing?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He is coming from the clouds in a shower of gold!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He is so beautiful, so beautiful!
j_dunlevy_69: am I?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Oh holy lord Zeus, fill me with your essence!
j_dunlevy_69: is he doing u?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Oh my lord, he is reaching his hand for mine!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What should I do?
j_dunlevy_69: let him do it so i can get some next
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But I will be pregnant from nine to eleven months!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I don’t want to be pregnant, I am only 14!
j_dunlevy_69: then tell him to put his semen in a cup for u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He wants to talk to you.
j_dunlevy_69: ok
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: HELLO MORTAL
j_dunlevy_69: hey
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SUP?
j_dunlevy_69: how are u doing?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I AM READY TO CREATE A NEW LINEAGE OF GOD-MEN. YOU?
j_dunlevy_69: good
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: GLAD TO HEAR IT.
j_dunlevy_69: so u want a piece of the person that i care about alot?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: JUST HER WOMB
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: IF I COULD REMOVE IT AND PUT IT IN A DONKEY I TOTALLY WOULD.
j_dunlevy_69: but i care about her alot, and i would do anything for her
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: THAT’S NICE AND ALL BUT I’M ABOUT TO IMPREGNATE HER WITH MY BURNING SEED, DO YOU MIND?
j_dunlevy_69: u want to know the truth/
j_dunlevy_69: ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I ALREADY KNOW THE TRUTH, I AM OMNISCIENT.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: BUT “TELL” ME ANYWAYS.
j_dunlevy_69: i don’t mind because when u are done i will be able to make love to her
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: NOT FOR QUITE SOME TIME.
j_dunlevy_69: i know
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: ALSO, WHEN THE BABY IS BORN WHO KNOWS WHAT COULD HAPPEN? IT COULD EXPLODE OUT OF HER VULVA WITH THE FORCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS!
j_dunlevy_69: u know what nevermind
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: NEVER MIND WHAT?
j_dunlevy_69: please don’t do her
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: BUT I MUST! IT IS IN PROPHECIES AND SHIT!
j_dunlevy_69: why did u choose her
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: BECAUSE HER LINEAGE IS PURE AND I GAVE HER DAD TWENTY BUCKS.
j_dunlevy_69: the holy lord does not swear
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: YOU’RE THINKING OF JEHOVAH.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I’M ZEUS. GREEK. DIFFERENT GOD.
j_dunlevy_69: oh
j_dunlevy_69: so u are the one that shoves lighting bolts up peoples asses right
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: IF THEY ASK FOR IT, YES. LIGHTNING. THAT’S MY BUSINESS.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: ALSO IMPREGNATING WOMEN AND HAVING THEM GIVE BIRTH TO ANY NUMBER OF FANCIFUL CREATURES.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: AMBER’S BABY COULD HAVE SIX NOSES FOR ALL I KNOW, MY SPERM’S WACKY LKE THAT.
j_dunlevy_69: why do u have to impregnate her when she is 14?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I NEED TO MAKE SURE HER WOMB IS PURE
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: CAN I TELL YOU A SECRET?
j_dunlevy_69: sure
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: THIS IS REALLY AMBER’S DAD
j_dunlevy_69: really
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I’M NOT A GOD AT ALL
j_dunlevy_69: really
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: YEAH
j_dunlevy_69: can u do something for me then?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: PRETTY GOOD, HUH?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SURE, WHAT?
j_dunlevy_69: can u tell amber that i like her alot
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: OK. SHE SAYS THANK YOU.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I’M STILL GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH HER, YOU KNOW.
j_dunlevy_69: tell her u welcome
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: OK!
j_dunlevy_69: why u are her dad?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: YEAH, CRAZY, HUH?
j_dunlevy_69: that is sick
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: NOT REALLY, SHE THINKS I’M ZEUS!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SHE’S NOT VERY SMART.
j_dunlevy_69: lol
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: WHAT’S SO FUNNY?
j_dunlevy_69: what u just said
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: YOU THINK ME RAPING MY DAUGHTER IS FUNNY? YOU’RE MESSED UP, MORTAL.
j_dunlevy_69: do u know if she likes me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I THINK SHE LIKES YOU A LOT!
j_dunlevy_69: no i don’t think u raping ur daughter is funny
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: WHY DID YOU LOL THEN?
j_dunlevy_69: when u said that she is not very smart
j_dunlevy_69: would u let her go out with me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: WELL, SHE’S NOT. I JUST TURNED ON THE FAN AND ALL THE LIGHTS IN THE HOUSE AND THREW SOME GLITTER AROUND.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SURE, ONCE SHE GIVES BIRTH TO MY BABY YOU TWO KIDS CAN JUST GO OUT AND HAVE A CRAZY TIME
j_dunlevy_69: would u let me make love to her?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SURE, WHAT DO I CARE? ONCE I GET THAT BABY I’M SET.
j_dunlevy_69: so u don’t care if i make love to her even though she is young?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: SHE’LL BE 15 OR 16 BY THE TIME SHE GIVES BIRTH TO THE BABY.
j_dunlevy_69: cool
j_dunlevy_69: and u don’t mind?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: NOT A BIT, MY GOOD MAN!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: JUST DON’T BLOW THIS WHOLE ZEUS THING FOR ME, OK?
j_dunlevy_69: u are cool
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I’M A PRETTY COOL DAD!
j_dunlevy_69: i won’t
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: DO YOU WANT TO TALK TO HER A BIT BEFORE I GET IT ON WITH HER?
j_dunlevy_69: do u think that i could go out with her right now?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: YOU COULD GO OUT WITH HER BUT DO YOU REALLY WANT TO DATE A PREGNANT GIRL?
j_dunlevy_69: i don’t mind i have before
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I GUESS SO, BUT DON’T DO ANYTHING TO HURT MY BABY, THAT THING’S GOING TO BE WORTH A LOT OF MONEY.
j_dunlevy_69: don’t worry about it i don’t want to hurt her, because i think that i love her
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: WOW. DO YOU WANT TO TALK TO HER FOR A BIT? I HAVE TO DO SOME EXERCISES TO ENSURE MAXIMUM POTENCY – IT’LL TAKE ABOUT TEN MINUTES.
j_dunlevy_69: ok thanx man
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: OKAY HERE’S AMBER.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Hi! This is so amazing!
j_dunlevy_69: what?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Zeus is here in my house!
j_dunlevy_69: really
j_dunlevy_69: guess what he told me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That my baby is going to be the new messiah!
j_dunlevy_69: no that was not it
j_dunlevy_69: he told me that i could go out with u right now if i didn’t mind that u are pregnant
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That is so great!
j_dunlevy_69: i know
j_dunlevy_69: u want to know what i told him?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What?
j_dunlevy_69: i told him that i think that i love u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Zeus told you that I could go out with you! He is a god and everything!
j_dunlevy_69: yes
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And he wasn’t jealous and didn’t strike you with lightning?
j_dunlevy_69: no, and he also told me that me and u can have sex whenever we want to
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Has anything like this ever happened to you before?
j_dunlevy_69: like what with the zeus part or dating someone that is pregnant?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Both, I guess.
j_dunlevy_69: i have dated someone that was pregnant, but i have never had something done to me like the zeus thing
j_dunlevy_69: can i ask u a question?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Of course!
j_dunlevy_69: do u really want to be with me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! You seem so nice and caring and considerate!
j_dunlevy_69: so u would like to go out with me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Of course!
j_dunlevy_69: would u ever consider marrying me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If the gods will it!
j_dunlevy_69: do u love me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I think I do!
j_dunlevy_69: so u think that u do love me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Wow. Today is the best day of my life!
j_dunlevy_69: why?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I am about to be impregnated by Zeus and I found a boyfriend too!
j_dunlevy_69: yep
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Will you act as a father to my half-divine child?
j_dunlevy_69: yes i will
j_dunlevy_69: i will do anything for u, because i love u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Zeus kind of smells funny.
j_dunlevy_69: what do u mean?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Like motor oil and whiskey or something.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Not like I thought a God would smell.
j_dunlevy_69: lol
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What’s so funny? You shouldn’t laugh at a God!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He has lightning!
j_dunlevy_69: i know something that zeus told me not to tell u
j_dunlevy_69: but if i don’t tell u then u will be making a big mistake
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Is it about the mysteries of the dead lands? Or the holy scriptures of Canaan?
j_dunlevy_69: what?
j_dunlevy_69: if i tell u this u will tell zeus?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If you tell me he will know, he is omniscient! Knows all, sees all!
j_dunlevy_69: whatever
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: He has many powers!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Don’t tell me, because I don’t want to lose you.
j_dunlevy_69: but i am going to lose u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No! Why do you say that?
j_dunlevy_69: because that zeus character is a joke
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: How could you say such a thing! He is the father of Hercules!
j_dunlevy_69: is more like the father of u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Excuse me? I am not a half-God!
j_dunlevy_69: zeus is actually ur father he is acting like zeus to have sex with u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What? That is absurd!
j_dunlevy_69: i am telling u this because i have gone out with someone that got raped by there dad, and i don’t want it to happen again because i love u alot
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: How could he – but he – there was a rain of gold!
j_dunlevy_69: that was glitter coming off the fans
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No way.
j_dunlevy_69: u don’t believe me, am i right?
j_dunlevy_69: the reason why he smells like motor oil is because he passed out in the garage and the reason why he smells like whiskey is because he has been drinking
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That is sheer madness!
j_dunlevy_69: do u believe me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I am confused.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Does this mean my baby will not be eleven feet tall and breathe fire?
j_dunlevy_69: no he won’t
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Does this mean I will not dine on ambrosia with Aphrodite and Hermes?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: My whole life has been a lie?
j_dunlevy_69: sorry
j_dunlevy_69: but i still love u
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Well, that’s all well and good.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But there’s still the matter of my dad dressed up in a toga wanting to knock me up here.